ICEE International

Those of you from the New Orleans area will get a kick out of this for sure. This is a lychee ICEE I got for in the Central Airport Plaza theater for the movie 'American Gangster'. The flavor was not all that great, but it did remind me that there is nothing better in this world than a strawberry ICEE on a hot summer night, well other than a Barq's ICEE :)

In all fairness, a spearmint or pink lemonade snowball from Casey's or a strawberry one from Plum Street can hit the spot. I have it on good authority the granny smith apple at Firehouse is good, but I can't stand granny smith apples.

LudiCris Rating of 4
2 Slurrps

Holy basil, Batman!

No, really, holy basil *cough*

Finally, a cooking class in Chiang Mai, Thailand. One of the very few check boxes I had before I left the states. This was only a one-day class, but quite fun and educational (see scary picture of Mark, my teacher, above).

Menu:

Tom yam kung (hot & sour prawn soup)

Yam woon-sen (spicy glass noodle salad)

Phat Thai (do you really need an explanation for this one?)

Kat phat met-ma-maung (stir-fried chicken with cashews)

Kaeng khiaw-waan kai (green curry chicken)

Khao-neeaw ma-muang (sticky rice with mangos)

Just like any cooking - it's all very easy if there's an expert looking over your shoulder, not allowing you to screw anything up.

Just a reminder:

...and a memory.

Archa Beer

I think they got the wrong end of the horse for the label on this beer.

Ok, it's actually not terrible, but I couldn't resist the comment. Tastes very similar to a Budweiser, which is pretty damn good for an Asian beer, mind you.

The road to enlightenment in just 3 hours

I was soo close to Nirvana (Nibbana), I could taste it. It's one of those new Thai boutique beers, right?
Actually, I did spend 3 hours in a meditation session with four others. I came out no more enlightened, really, but I did catch a few ...zzz (I was supposed to be concentrating, but it's difficult on a night of train 'sleep') and get a free glass of refreshing dried longan iced tea.

Lawn ornament

Forget gnomes, I found this beaut at Wat Pho. Only problem is I haven't figured out how to smuggle it past the guards, get it shipped to the States, and get it through customs.

Wat?

This enormous reclining Buddha was found relaxing (and posing) in Wat Pho in Bangkok. The random picture-taking tourist is there for scale.

Ladyboy toilet

I know this is supposed to be the sign to the women's toilet, but REALLY. Who sketched this, Dr. Frank-N-Furter?

Fair warning...

This was at the entrance to the Grand Palace / Wat Phra Kaew. I think the last line just sums up Bangkok in a nutshell.

Thailandish Snoball

Little bits of flavored gelatin, candied orange peel, and bite-sized cubes of fresh french bread (?) all packed under a mound of shaved ice and drizzled with fruit syrup and condensed milk. With the exception of the bread, and the fact that it must have been 98 degrees in the shade, I'd say a solid...

4 Slurrps

Designer buses in Thailand

This is exactly, down to the hanging potpourri hearts, how I'm going to decorate my next place of residence.

Khao Sok National Park

It's no Paradise (le sigh, it's been almost two days since I left), but it's quite nice nonetheless.

Practising for the circus: Caption Contest

First ever Cris World Tour caption contest!

Second Prize: Your name here.
First Prize: A crappy souvenir from the streets of Bangkok (most likely just picked up from a gutter in one of the red light districts)
Grand Prize: Full ladyboy surgery at the cheapest place I can find.

Enter as often as you like. Employees of www.flobotomy.blogspot.com and www.crisworldtour.com not eligible.

My entry: ''The centuries-old, traditional (some may even say religious) Thai ritual of squeezing clueless tourists into tiny metal boxes on wheels.''

Paradise Contact Info:

Look, Paradise even has an address and phone number!

Trouble in Paradise

Uh-oh. A dispute over my snorkel rental had to be moved to the police station. I was not deterred in the endless pursuit of faux journalism, snapping this picture of my possible future jail cell. Not very intimidating, is it? :) The dispute was resolved by me deciding that getting cheated out of a few dollars was not worth my time waiting for the policeman to come back from his fishing trip/drug run/siesta under the coconut tree to help translate.

Fishing in Paradise

When the fishing guide says '6 o'clock!' and starts shaking their head with the implication that these crazy tourists will never learn NOT to leave at eleven-ish, it's probably time to reevaluate the level of optimism for the day's haul. Still, it was great fun. Got to snorkel some beautiful island reefs and actually catch three piddly fish. Err, I mean massive fish (been a while since I've been fishing - I've forgotten how to tell whoppers *cough*). You can see just how large they are in the celebration lunch, where they are shown fried whole with enough garlic to keep all Transylvanian civilians supplied for a year.

Paradise

I walked into the official Thailand Tourist Authority (TAT) and demanded they take me to an island where one could snorkel brilliant coral reefs by just walking off the beach, where the food was lovingly prepared by expert Thai cooks, where the food consisted of fresh seafood caught that very day in the very spot where I snorkeled (such that I could browse the dinner menu and swim at the same time), where the beer was less than $1, and it costs me less than $15 per night to have my own private bungalow. They sent me to Ko Bulon Le, which can only mean one thing in Thai...Paradise (that's Paradise with a capital P)

It's gettin' hot in here...

I don't think I can take off any more clothes in this heat, though, without being indecent. This was in the night market in Hat Yai. I didn't know what to do with the chiles, but I did purchase some limes to help me quaff the swill they call beer here. Singha is quite lovely on a hot night like tonight with a sqeeze of fresh lime. (How is it possible, by the way, that no amount of lime will ever help a Corona?)

War Wound #2

Five months and only two injuries so far. Not too shabby, considering I didn't even have to go to the hospital this time. This piddly scrape happened whilst hiking in Taman Negera National Park.

Who's the cook here, anyway?

Ok, new rule: only one in every three posts can be about food...after this one of course.

One thing Asian cuisine has right - the fun of personalizing your meal. Finally, 20 some-odd years of getting told not to play with my food, I have finally found a culture where it's encouraged(italics). What you see here is raw minced garlic, sliced red chiles, sliced green chilis (very hot!), soy sauce, and a very sweet, thick dark sauce for dressing the delicious bowl of bak kut teh pictured. The rice was for sculpting if you got bored with the rest, I think.

Customer serice for Cris World Tour provided by:

Meet Amir, a customer support tech manager working for the California based electronics company, but residing here in Penang. A great guy, he runs a personal/political blog and was a pleasure to have a coffee with and talk about the U.S. primaries. Next time you get to talk to tech support, be on your best behavior - remember these people are smarter than you (else why would you be calling in the first place?)

8 ball, corner pocket

Except there's no eight ball. I remembered today why I don't play snooker. Take a game of American pool, double the size of the table, halve the size of the balls, and adjust the openings of the pockets to half again the size of the balls, and there you have it - the most frustrating version of pocket billiards ever invented...at least until they figure out how to take the cues away as well.

Vignettes on Vietnam

1 - Here's my ultimate Saigon challenge to you: try and walk down the street for one block without being offered to buy a genuine pair of Gucci sunglasses or a Prada handbag. If you make it, I'll buy you a genuine pair. No, they're real, I promise.
2 - Pho is phenomenal.
Mouse is delicious, snake is not.
Vintamit fried chip mixture (banana, jackfruit, taro, and yam) is addictive.
3 - There are roughly eight (8) million people in Saigon. There are roughly five (5) million motorbikes. Be very careful crossing the street!4 - The beer in Asia is awful.

Vietnamese Water Puppet Show

I really dig the picture of the audience's reaction, but check out the video for some real, hardcore puppet action.

Cooking school

The results of a morning-long instruction from Mrs. Phung: pho bo and ga nuong la chanh. The only problem with learning in a restaurant kitchen? I only know how to make pho for 20 people now. It's ok, though. I only know how to make red beans and rice for 20 people, and it's worked out. Anyone for a pho party in July?

Ah, I almost forgot. The ga nuong la chanh is grilled chicken with lemon leaves. Fantastic.

LudiCris Rating 4
5 Slurrps

Rice field

Towards the rear of this beautiful rice field I could actually see workers sowing rice by throwing large handfuls as they walked through. I was like they were celebrating humankind's marriage to the earth with their grand scattering. (Ok, ok. I'll admit that might be one of the most ridiculous metaphors I've ever used.)

Before and After

As part of our continuing series of snake encounters, I give you...lunch. No, I'm not feeding it the mouse from dinner the night before. It's feeding my belly.



LudiCris Rating 3
3 Slurrps

Can Rai floating market

A real, functioning market in the middle of the Mekong. This is a watermelon retailer, but most of the boats were much bigger and selling fruits and vegetables wholesale. Each merchant has a 15m pole extending straight up from the boat deck, around which is tied a sample of whatever products are for sale. Just like a regular market, it also had a few prepared food vendors. You could get a bowl of hot, steaming pho prepared right at your boat (with real bowls and utensils, although I have pretty good idea where they're washed after each meal).

Mouse

Dave, a mate from a 3-day Mekong Delta tour, chowing down on a grilled field mouse. It had the consistency of a dark fowl meat (duck or even dark chicken meat) and the flavor was a cross between dark fowl meat and lamb, since it was prepared with mint. Quite delicious.

LudiCris Rating of 5
4 Slurrps

Boa

Like my new featherless boa?

LudiCris Rating 4

Are you kidding me?

I was brave enough to dance around two snakes, run through a bull pen with a solid red shirt on, and play a live version of Frogger walking across the street in Saigon, but I could not bring myself to try 'Cajun' food in Vietnam. I can't remember the last place in the states that had edible Cajun or Creole food outside of south Louisiana. I did sneak a peek at the menu, though. They served about 100 dishes, only one of which had any connection to Cajun cuisine - blackened fish. What's next, a fais-do-do dance hall?

LudiCris Rating 4

Bia Saigon

This beer hall is the real deal, Saigon style. Kegs are rolled over from the brewery next door (333, Saigon, Bivina, etc.), opened (not tapped), and siphoned into these plastic jugs for consumption on the spot.
1 plastic jug = 1 litre = 8,000 Dong = 50¢ US

Ben Thanh Market in Ho Chi Minh City

Fish so fresh they were still jumping out of the pot, literally. You had to be quite careful as you walked past these that you didn't get wet with all the flip-flap-flopping going on.